Surgery Woes

I’m back lovelies! With only a slight part of me missing!

I have had appendicitis and got my appendix removed and I am now out of hospital slowly recovering (I got told 6 weeks of no intense lifting or exercise….now I have a real excuse for not going to the gym or running in general).

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God I was in so much pain! I couldn’t sleep properly, I hadn’t eaten in two days which ended up turning into four because they kept pushing my surgery date back, Eventually I was just sick of being sick. I wanted to be able to get out of bed, I was sick of crappy daytime TV (even though I became addicted to Days of Our Lives) and all I wanted to do was go back to doing things.

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And now I’m free!!!!!

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This was just a little update to let you guys know what’s going on and I just wanted to say that I have a lot in the works. From YouTube videos to a bunch of blog post ideas, I’m ready to come out swinging this second half of the year! So hopefully we can gather some momentum and I can begin making some blogging friends and family!

I’ll leave my little update here and hopefully you guys stick with me!

Stay gold xx

Stuck in a Rut

It’s a feeling that I’m sure everybody has experienced.

Feeling alone, useless and as though you’re basically wasting your life away?

That’s how I feel right now. I sleep in until 9 – 10am and then I open my laptop and binge watch a show on Netflix (currently it’s Orange is the New Black). By the time I start to cramp up it’s 1:30 and I decide I should probably get up and go get something to eat. I’m not hungry because I’m doing nothing so I’ll have a bickie and some water then relocate to the couch. I’ll watch the show’s I taped the night before (Bob’s Burgers and The Simpson’s) and then I toss up whether or not I can be bothered to have a shower. I bathe, brush my teeth and then go right back to sitting on the couch. It hits the end of the work day and I go back into my room because my family are coming home. We are not speaking for a few reasons (nothing to do with this routine) and I go back to writing or watching Netflix. University is on a semester break and I am unemployed (and not due to a lack of trying).

I do nothing with my life. I see all these people on Facebook having fun adventures like holidays to America or going out partying at nights and I clutch onto my phone waiting for my boyfriend to text me whenever he can whilst he works. And this is the cycle my week goes through until the weekend where I go hang out with my boyfriend and then return home right back into the cycle.

I don’t have friends, as sad as this sounds. With high school ending it’s not as though I am trapped with these people that I have to see everyday and form friendships with. It’s the point in our lives where making an effort is too much. I’ve tried to connect with the friends I’ve had but something always seems to come up. Once I stop messaging them first, I get no messages.

I would love to be going out with friends and actually talking to people but it’s hard and I feel like I’m stuck in the past whilst everyone is moving on ahead of me. I made a couple of friends at uni, you know, people you sit next to and make small talk with but would never hang out with outside of class. I guess none of us couple really break that barrier. When I moved interstate I had to put myself out there and I made quite a few friends. But homesickness got the best of me and I moved back before any of them were really solid. So now, I am basically alone.

I would love to work but for some reason I keep getting rejected. I’ve rewritten and rewritten my resume, I’ve applied at as many different places as possible and I’ve broadened my spectrum of employment from just retail to as many places as possible (even a fish packing place). But no-one wants to hire me. I guess my lack of experience is a factor. I’ve never had a proper job before and a lot of places require previous experience (I still apply though – it’s worth a shot!) or certain certificates that I wouldn’t even complete in time let alone have the money to undertake. My parents are no longer paying for me so I have to ration what I spend and now I can barely use my car with petrol taking a substantial amount of my money.

Every time I go to bed I sit there and think about another day I have wasted. People my age have died without living and yet here I am wasting each day that has been given to me. Do I really want to look back at my year of being 18 and think “well that was an absolute waste. You achieved nothing”? I loved to blog and I was even thinking of expanding to YouTube and meeting more people but I’ve had no motivation. It’s like everything that I want to do has stopped and everybody else is moving forward and I’m so worried I’m going to be left behind.

I just don’t know what to do.

I’m sorry for this depressing post but I had no other way to express this. And I thought it was a pretty relatable thing. I need some advice as well and what a great place to get some – the Internet! So if you feel like I do right now drop your stories down in the comments section. If not, but you have some tips and tricks also leave those down below! Any other messages you want to leave me, feel free to drop them down in the comments as well. Hopefully now that I’ve started blogging again I can get back into it. I really did love the feeling when I’d see people read what I wrote and when they left a comment or a like I was ecstatic!

Hope you have a great day and follow this blog! xx

Public Transport Drinking Game

Hello my lovely readers! Recently I have been frequenting public transport and I’ve noticed a trend of people. You get a certain type of person that you see all the time whilst using public transport. It gave me an idea – a public transport drinking game!

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But then I realised that it’s illegal to drink in public where I live. So I decided for those places like my own where you can’t drink in public or if you’re underage, change it to bingo! Have a competition with your mates on a trip just to get some entertainment. Here’s how it works:

I’ve sorted the types of people from most common to those rare or occasional people that you’ll see at certain events. To make it relatable think human Pokemon: I’ve sorted them into your rattatas and pidgeys to the Mewtos. Then depending on the category an amount of alcohol that you have to consume has been allocated. If you’re playing the Bingo version just write down the different people in a 3×3 table and then cross them off as you go – standard Bingo rules!

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Drink a Mouthful of your Chosen Drink:

  • When you see a person asleep
  • Sit next to someone playing music so loud that you can hear it *BONUS POINT: IF YOU CAN SING THE SONG AND/OR NAME THE ARTIST OR TITLE*
  • Hear a person talking obnoxiously loud on a phone (the level is to be decided by the group
  • A teenage boy with long hair *BONUS POINT: FOR FACIAL PIERCINGS AND/OR VERY TIGHT SKINNY JEANS*
  • Teenage boy with a dirty moustache (think peach fuzz)

Drink a Mouthful of Spirits:

  • If a person is drunk and disorderly
  • A person is blocking a seat with a bag *BONUS POINTS: PER SEAT THAT THEY BLOCK*
  • An elderly person with a trolley (as picture below):
    Trolley
  • A person wearing socks and sandals *BONUS POINTS: IF IT’S THE ELDERLY PERSON WITH A TROLLEY*
  • If their is a piece of visible rubbish in the mode of transport *BONUS POINTS: PER PIECE OF RUBBISH MOUTHFUL OF YOUR CHOSEN DRINK*
  • For every minute you’re late take a mouthful
  • A person has their feet on the seats
  • A person has their shoes off *BONUS POINTS: IF THE PERSON HAS BOTH THEIR SHOES OFF AND THEIR FEET ON THE SEAT*
  • Every time another train, tram or bus toots

Finish Your Chosen Drink:

  • If you pass a “landmark” or famous building of the city (to be decided by the group)
  • A religious person is spotted (e.g. a monk, nun etc.) *BONUS POINTS: IF THE RELIGIOUS PERSON IS OF YOUR FAITH HAVE A MOUTHFUL OF SPIRITS*
  • If you stop at a station that starts with the first letter of your first name *BONUS POINTS: FINISH THE REST OF THE GROUPS DRINK IF THE FINAL DESTINATION STARTS WITH THE SAME LETTER*
  • If a person is wearing the merchandise of a sporting team, celebrity etc. *BONUS POINTS: IF A PLAYER GOES FOR THE SAME TEAM OR IT’S THEIR FAVOURITE CELEBRITY THEN THEY MUST HAVE A MOUTHFUL OF SPIRITS*
  • When someone is flashing their boobs, bum or willy *BONUS POINTS: PLAYERS OF THE SAME GENDER AS THE PERSON FLASHING MUST HAVE A MOUTHFUL OF SPIRITS*

And there you go! I mean if you wanted to get really drunk just play that you have to take a mouthful every time you see someone from a different race or speaking a different language. In a country as multicultural as Australia that will get you sh!t faced very fast. A game to have fun, get drunk and challenge your mates. If you have anything you want to add to the list or if you give it a go, let me know! Maybe there’s some livestream that watches the public on public transport that I don’t know about so you can play the game at home!

Sh!t Lads Say

Hello everyone! I am writing to you now with experience from the clubbing scene and the university scene and I have noticed something. You know those stereotypical lads? Those young adults who wear V-Neck tops and spray tan darker then most teenage girls. Think Geordie Shore.

GazGaz here to demonstrate the look.

Now don’t get me wrong, this is not what all the guys do. Just majority. So whilst I have been out and about and interacted with these guys I have composed a list of crap that they do almost all the time.

1. Instead of dancing properly they just fist pump

The classic fist pump – the moves for girls and guys alike that cannot dance well at all. I am guilty of this move as I have no coordination or rhythm at all but this just seems to be the major go to move for guys like this. Combine it with the vigorous body shaking and spinning around in circles causing mayhem and broken toes for the girls with opened toe shoes and you’ve got the best dance move that will welcome you to this group of guys. I have seen it happen many times before. You join in on the “oi oi oi”‘s that they get chanting whilst waiting for the bass to drop, get your fist in the air and you are one of them. You have passed the initiation phase.

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2. If fist pumping is not available the point and shake is the next move of choice

If the person cannot even manage the rhythm or find the space to fist pump then the next move will be the point. Pointing towards the DJ, towards the pretty group of girls dancing together, pointing to the bar, pointing to their mates, pointing to a wall; nothing if safe from the point. I guess it’s supposed to get everyone hyped up and by pointing it will magically bring them to the dance floor like a dancing wand. They’ll generally then gyrate their whole body to the music trying to make up for the point showing that they’re here for a good time and ladies, they can dance.

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3. They punch their hand during every sentence

Maybe it’s an excited thing like when people talk to fast and they develop the momentary stutter because their brain can’t keep up to their mouth. Maybe it’s their way of emphasising how cool their point is. No matter what the answer the fist to the open palm whilst talking is a classic. It’s not even an intimidation thing but they’ll couple it with an arms wide open and a “cheeky” grin and you can talk like “one of the lads”.

*Sadly I couldn’t find a GIF of this because I couldn’t describe it properly HOWEVER I’ll just include another Geordie Shore reference

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4. Runners are always the trend

Runners are always the peak of fashion. But only those Nike runners or other name brand shoes. Who needs those classic going out shoes when you can bring back junners (jeans and runners) and look trendy? It’s generally with skinny jeans and the runners encase the ankles of the person giving the freshest look out.

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There is probably heaps more I could write about but I feel I can sign off here. Who knows? I might do a part two! I guess I did kind of lie about clubbing and uni being my only sources for this as it is pretty obvious the TV show “Geordie Shore” was a big resource. I absolutely love that show and have been having a massive binge watch haha!

So let me know down below any other trademark “lad” staples that you have noticed when you’re out in public! Also no offence was intended by this, it’s all for a laugh!

Unlucky in Life

You know when things are just awful and then it always gets worse? That is my day right now. I am writing to you all from the seat of my car out the front of a train station. I have a punctured tire that is as saggy as loose skin on a 130 year old person’s arm and I missed my train buy seconds – I was literally buying the ticket when it left early.

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But these have not been my only misfortunes. So far this week I have:

  • Punctured my tire
  • Broke my rim through driving with said tire
  • Lost the hub cap to the tire
  • Missed the first class for my university course that I am three weeks behind in due to my transfer
  • Been turned down for a large number of jobs
  • Got so many spots that you could do a connect the dots on my face and you’d probably get the most amazing, detailed art piece ever

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Not all things are bad I guess. I have food, water, a great internet connection, I’m healthy and the weather has been nicer. Sadly I’m in too much of a funk to acknowledge this (and the fact that I am sunburnt thanks to the sun #PaleLife).

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I don’t really know the purpose of this post. A whinge maybe? Maybe it’s just my way of sharing what has happened so hopefully I can put it in perspective? It’s going that bad I feel as though I was probably a mosquito in my past life – nothing too bad but I still shared malaria around.

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Don’t get me wrong, I know there are people with real problems out there. I’m just feeling sorry for myself and the fact that it is coming constantly is getting to me. If it had happened al lat once I’d probably be over it by now – it’s the fact it keeps coming like I’ve failed over whilst skiing and every time I go to stand back up another skier comes past and stabs me into the ground with their skiing stick. Just a side note: In case you could tell I have never been skiing before so please forgive the analogy!

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Anyway! I’m sorry for the short, depressing update after the absence. Life’s been hectic but I truly am intending to come back and blog all the time now! I want to make something out of this blog with you guys as well! So tell me, how has your week been going?

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How to Make Friends!

Hello reader(s)! I’ve been very busy recently getting to my new life! I’ve moved out of home, to a whole new state and I know no one here. I clung to my mum until she drove away.

I’d been sitting in my room going stir crazy. If I had to watch one more talk show I would’ve lost it. This prompted me to do the unthinkable….I went outside.

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I wandered the hallways aimlessly trying to find a person who didn’t look completely intimidating. I walked up and down stairs into an empty common room and then back down to the lobby. I checked the Facebook group that had all of the new students and I tried to see if there was anyone that I had stuff in common with. Long story short I came back to my room, too frightened to strike up a conversation and meet up with a stranger.

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Not all of this experience was awkward, scary and sweaty! Whilst sitting in the lobby I came up with this list on how to make friends which is completely ironic considering I have 0 myself lol.

Follow a person you find interesting around until they acknowledge you

You see that person in the cool top? Follow them around. You see that person wandering around looking a bit lost? Follow them as well. Find a person that you think looks interesting enough and follow them. They’re bound to notice you eventually and when they do they’ll say something! This is the perfect option for people who don’t like to strike up the conversation themselves and would rather it be started by the other person. If you have been following the person around for a while and they haven’t noticed you yet try getting their attention by coughing a few times, squeaking and stamping your shoes and even squirting water or something on them. If you end up in the wrong class due to following them just play it cool, go along with it. At least you’ll have something to converse about right? Just make sure they acknowledge you after a while or else you will end up following them home and that could be creepy.

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Pretend to Faint

Find a group of people. Walk up to them. Faint. Not really but pretend to. Talk about conversation starters, am I right? This is relies on the shock factor. You faint in front of this group of people and they all rush to help you. You get up after a minute or two and have a great conversation starter! “What happened?” “Oh you know I didn’t have breakfast so my sugar was low” “Oh my gosh here let me give you my go to breakfast recipe” and boom. Friends. For this one try to do it in a setting where there is a soft surface to fall onto because you don’t want real injuries.

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Take Up Voodoo

For this you’re going to have to become a collector and very observant. Find pieces of gum under desks, strands of hair on jumpers, empty cans etc. anything that you can get a piece of a person’s DNA from. If you have some hair make a voodoo doll. If you have gum, set a charm on it. Use all of this too make people become your friends. This is the perfect way to beat the awkward small talk and removes the fear of rejection as it is almost guaranteed that they like you (guaranteed if you do it right)!

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Okay so I was just kidding with those ones. They are definitely not recommended at all! I thought of them after I made the real list (below) because I thought of extreme (very, very, very extreme) ways to make friends. I mean if the list below seems to fail then definitely feel free to pretend to faint. It has not been tried before but I’m pretty sure it will (not) work.

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Join Relevant Groups and Pages

If you’re going to college/university, joining a club or even moving schools try and find Facebook pages that are run by groups within that school, club or uni. This is a great way to network and meet people early before the move. This is where a lot of places share events that are going on and if it’s at the start of the year or semester there will be orientation activities for you to undertake which will be great mingling opportunities! If you’re feeling nervous and lonely I can guarantee there is someone feeling just like you, if not worse. This can act as a reassurance to settle some of the nerves about moving to a place where you know someone or joining an activity where you know zero people.

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This one can be a bit risky. Double check that the page is officially linked to the organisation and run by relevant people. If you add people from the page don’t meet up with them alone and don’t meet up in a secluded place. Don’t give out your address even if they’re in your building until you know them. These are all basic Tinder rules and involve common sense to be honest. Play it safe and you’ll be fine!

Join Clubs

This is literally just the real life version of the one above. Join clubs, societies, sports etc. that interest you! If you love dancing, join the dancing club! If you love playing board games join the board game club! No club for any activities that you like? Make one! This is my number one way to make friends as it is a tried and tested method (by yours truly). Except I made the mistake of joining a sport during its fitness training period so I am basically a sweaty mess every time I try to socialise but that’s okay because we all are! It is one of the easiest ways to meet people who have common interests with you (automatically giving you something to talk about so it’s not awkward like striking up a conversation) and by joining a team or a club you get to go to constant meet ups and social events which minimises the need to plan social outings (which can be hard to pencil in).

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Sit Next to Another Loner

Much like yourself there are lonely people out there. There will most definitely be one in your class. Go in a little bit behind everyone else so you have no real choice but to sit next to someone. If you see someone in a sea of empty seats (like you would have been if you had gone in early) go sit with them! Strike up a conversation like “wow this room is big” or “I like your pencil case”. Then in the breaks you can discuss the class – a conversation starter. Learn the person’s name, a little bit about them and then agree to sit next to each other next time! If you’re too nervous to strike up a conversation give them a smile and try to stay off your phone. This way you’ll look friendly and approachable, by having your head in your phone people can often be deterred from talking to you because they feel like you’re busy or not interested in talking to them; so just unplug for a couple of minutes!

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Old Fashioned Way

Here’s the one all of us socially awkward people are terrified about. Having to strike up a conversation with a……stranger. Here’s a little guide on how. Don’t be on your phone when walking to or waiting for your class. As mentioned above it can deter people from talking to you. Smile at people who look at you and try to hold the eye contact rather then instantly look away. If you feel confident enough give a wave. Talk to the people around you even if it’s just a little comment here or there and get chatting away. It will slowly become easier the more you talk and then when it’s time to actually go to class you just continue the conversation and end up sitting next to them, sneaky huh?

Well I wish you all the very best in your friendship endeavours! I hope these tips (the last 3!) help you out in some way and give you that little bit of help to make some friends! Good luck xx

What are your tips and tricks for making friends? Let me know in the comments below!

P.S. Did you know there was such a thing as “social interaction trainer”? Neither did I!

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Secret Songs: Sex and School

First of all I’d like to apologise for the hiatus! I have been away (and haven’t had internet) and I have also been getting things ready for university! Just a little update for you all (if you were curious) I got into my university of choice even after not getting the score I needed (check out Failure for a bit of background information)! Now I’m getting back into the swing of writing and I am ready to get into the year!

I was at a party the other day and the song “Blurred Lines” came on. You know the one. Hidden rapist undertones and a not very subtle creep vibe. This got me thinking about how many other songs have creepy, weird or scary meanings behind them. As well as songs about controversial issues, one’s with weird or scary film clips, songs that were banned etc. This has brought me to this new series I’m going to start which is called “Song Secrets”, creative I know.

For this first one I’ve decent to look at catchy and very famous songs which were based around the topic of school shootings and songs with sexual innuendos. I started researching and compiled this list! Please note that all of these meanings are my own opinions and you can think whatever you like about the songs! Let’s kick it off.

School Shooting Songs

This one is a bit of a category for a bunch of songs. The meanings behind them isn’t necessarily hidden or subtle but the idea that they’re talking about an event that legitimately happened is scary and sad. The events themselves are awful and tragic so songs written about them can’t exactly be the most beautiful songs written (in a sweet way. Some of the music is actually really great). I think the scariest part about these songs though is they’re written as catchy and almost fun.

People sing them and know all the words but don’t really think about the meaning; little kids sing some of these songs! In my opinion the creepiest one is “Pumped Up Kick” by Foster the People. I love this song and used to sing it all the time when I was little. I didn’t know the meaning behind it so I’d sing it all the time. Isn’t that a bit twisted? A little kid is singing a song about a school shooting? Anyway these are the songs that I think fit in this category of being great songs about an awful topic that can even be neglected whilst signing it.

“I Don’t Like Monday’s” – Boomtown Rats

This song is about the shooting that occurred at Cleveland Elementary School on the 29th of January in 1979 in San Diego California. It was a public elementary school and both the principal and a custodian were killed whilst eight children and a police officer were injured. Brenda Spencer, the shooter, was 16 at the time and lived in a house across the street from the school. She was tried as an adult and pleaded guilty to the two counts of murder and assault with a deadly weapon. She was given an indefinite sentence.

She was reached by a reported whilst she was still in her house but had stopped shooting. She was asked why she carried out the shooting and answer “I don’t like Mondays”. This inspired the song written by Bob Geldof and performed by the Boomtown Rats.

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“Pumped Up Kicks” – Foster the People

The song is based around the growing trend in teenage mental illness. It was intended to bring awareness to the issue of gun violence among youths. The issue of youth violence is actually quiet close to the band as Mark Foster (the lead vocalist) was bullied in high school and Cubbie Fink, the bands bassist, has a cousin who survived the Columbine High School massacre in 1999.

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“Jeremy” – Pearl Jam

The inspiration for this song comes from a newspaper article the band members read about a high school student who shot himself in front of his English class on the 8th of January 1991. The original video has caused a lot of controversy and was rejected by MTV due to its graphic nature which includes the students in the classroom being covered in blood spatter. I found this both an amazing and terrifying film clip!

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“Lullaby for Wayne” – Weezer

This song isn’t technically about a school shooting but it does seem to be describing the actions of a shooter whether that be in high school or college. It makes specific references to “putting the guns away” which can be seen as promoting an end to gun violence!

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Songs About Sex

“Isn’t that majority of the songs in the music industry?”, I hear you asking yourself. True as that may be, there are lots of songs with innuendos about sex rather than being clear. Here are a two of those:

“Drive My Car” – The Beatles

This song is one big innuendo. Actually reading through the lyrics, to me, this seems like a girl willing to sleep with someone to be famous! The verse where it goes “I told a girl that my prospects were good…..but I can show you a better time” is just one of the verses where it sounds like they’re discussing the sex.

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“He Ya”- OutKast

This one isn’t exactly an innuendo or as subtle as The Beatles but it does slide a sexual reference into a catchy song sung by young and old. “Don’t want to meet yo’ mama, just want to make you cumma”. A quickie has never been sung about in such a catchy way. The whole song is about a quick fling and then going your seperate ways so there are little references laced throughout.

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“Pretty in Pink” – Psychedelic Furs

This song is about a prostitute. Or something like that. Describing the woman as being “pretty in pink” is talking about her looking good naked. The final verse which goes “She waves, she buttons your shirt, the traffic is waiting outside” is talking about her saying goodbye after he has used her for the purpose of sex.

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I’ll end part one here! Hopefully you enjoyed it and the list made you think about what songs are really trying to say! Come up with your own interpretation, other songs and whatever else you’d like to add to the list! Keep checking back to see the second list which will feature a different topic or two!

Hope you enjoyed and I can’t wait to be back writing again xx

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Failure

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Alright so I’ve just had a breakdown and thought I’d share it with you all. I just received some exam results which were nowhere near as well as what I (and my teachers) had thought I would’ve received.

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I cried. A lot. My family tried to comfort me but I was honestly a sobbing, snotty, mess that could not be controlled. I was devastated. Not because it would impact on my future but because it was such a disappointment to myself. I had got nowhere near what I had expected and it upset me immensely. To put in all this effort to end up with nothing in return. Okay that’s a bit of a lie I still got an okay score just not as well as I hoped.

I cried for about an hour. No word of a lie, I checked the results at 7am and then could finally see the clock and it read 8:15am. By this point my mum was stressing out trying to comfort me and talk through “strategies” (which in times like this just seem frustrating and irritating. Like let me mourn in peace even though you’re trying to help).

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I received the “we’re still really proud of you” and “it doesn’t change who you are” but that didn’t really do much. That’s the sort of “filler” compliments parents use to make you feel better when they actually don’t know what to say.

Stock.jpg My dad’s expression as my tried to comfort me

By this point I realised I was becoming an angry and emotional mess who was unnecessarily beginning to take my frustration and anger at myself out on them which is something that I really did not want to do.

So I closed the results window (the result burned into my memory) and sat there for a few minutes, just breathing and crying. It took another few minutes for the tears to stop and then I began to compose myself. Crying and being angry and frustrated and myself and the whole education system was not going to change those stupid numbers that had almost destroyed my hope for university. This little number which seemed so important to me was going to be meaningless in a few years anyway; yet here I was letting it define me as a person.

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I think the true measure of character for anyone in these situations is how they handle and move on from the disappointment. I clicked onto VTAC (the website that released my results) and began looking for alternative courses. This really calmed me down; NOT ALL HOPE WAS LOST! It also reminded me that a lot of the courses I applied for accommodated for the score that I got.

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Mum was quickly on the phone to my careers counsellor and we set up a meeting for later on today so I could discuss a intermission year as I have decided to call it. This is the first year of a course that I take so I can transfer into another the year after because I didn’t meet its requirements. I’ve been writing down alternative subjects, universities and courses that I can study and it is honestly very reassuring. I thought all hope was lost, that I’d have to settle for not chasing the career that I really wanted. But then I realised that there was hope! I could do what I wanted to do!

happy-old-man-sitting-sofa-laptop-27720792.jpgI haven’t completely failed at life!

Of course overtime my phone pings with a text from a friend or family member asking what score I got and if I was happy it does sting. But it also allows me to be honest with myself and face the fact that yeah, I’m not happy. I’m honestly very disappointed. But I can’t change it now and can work with it.

For all of you students out there who may also be feeling this hurt and disappointment I thought I’d write this post to show two things. 1) that you are not alone in your disappointment and 2) how I dealt with it so it could hopefully provide you with some advice on how to do it as well.

I’m not getting up on a pedestal saying that I’m the greatest because I am handling this (moderately) okay. I’m just trying to give you guys some reassurance from a person who is also going through the exact same emotional rollercoaster that VCAA had strapped me on and now has finally let me off.

So! After reading this very long recount of my morning so far I will compose my “coping mechanisms” into a list:

1. It is okay to cry and be disappointed; If you don’t it will bottle up until you explode. That could be at yourself, family, friends or even having a breakdown in a public place. Let it out. You will honestly feel so much better.

2. Acknowledge that it was not what you were hoping for but you can’t change it; Unless you want to go through the hell of VCE all over again (which I’m not even sure you can), you can’t change what you got. Bombarding VCAA with emails asking why the scaling was so crap this year or your teachers as to why you didn’t do as well will not change that number. But, you earned that number. Whether it be through doing your best or not enough it was what YOU earned (with the little bonus of shitty scaling). This is where the whole hard love aspect comes in – you have to deal with it. Acknowledge that yeah you’re disappointed but also think “meh, I’ll just take another path to my degree” or whatever it is you want to do. THERE ARE ALTERNATIVES.

3. Look for those alternatives; Right now. Begin looking. Go to course search and scroll through every possible degree that relates to what you want to do. Then do some research on the university website as to whether your score can let you do the course. If not, find a course with the same 6 main elements or subjects and do that for a year then transfer! That is the best word I have heard all day – TRANSFER. Do some research into what you could do for a year before doing something else.

4. Talk to your careers counsellor/advisor; This is their prime time. Dealing with distressed students who are frantic after their results have been released. Use them! They are such a beneficial resource that does not get used enough so ring them and organise a meeting! Whether it be to discuss the result you got (to understand it better), your preferences or alternative courses, just book a meeting! It will help you by talking through this process with someone who was hired to help you in dealing with it. They’re more qualified than anyone to help you right now.

5. Just keep living your life; This sounds so cheesy I cringed whilst writing it, but it’s true. If you let the depressing cloud of your ATAR hang over your head for the next couple of months you’re not going to be enjoying the freedom that you will rarely ever have again. Think about it. You are not studying. You do not have any exams to prep for. You are 18 (most of us anyway). You have your whole life ahead of you. This is just a blip and if you let this blip control your actions for the future than you won’t be living your life, you will be living a life controlled by VCAA (who should be left behind right now). Think of all the positive things you will be looking forward to! Christmas, New Years Eve and your career! If you remain in this bitter and upset stage for long enough it will change you. Don’t let that happen.

6. Feel shitty; Okay this sort of contradicts the positive stereotypical message given above but for at least today feel shitty if you want to. You’re disappointed. You’re allowed to be disappointed. But once you start playing Sims College Life in a depressed state everyday instead of actually going out and living your life, that is when you need to snap out of it. If you hold in your feelings of being upset then they will consume you. But don’t let them get too out of control or else they will also control you. Find that balance, you can do it!

Alright so I’ll end this here; with me still slightly crying because this opened the wound writing down how crap I feel but hopefully you have some advice or at least some moral support. Feel free to comment or message me if you want to talk and have a whinge about the VCAA or anything in general! Hope you feel a little bit better and all the best wishes for your future x

Exam Tips!

Hi everyone! I’m so sorry for this long hiatus but as the title says, I have been studying for exams. I’ve got to do well so I have taken a slight internet detox to ensure I get the most from my studying!

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I AM NOW DONE so I can get back to doing what I love which is getting to share my writing on the internet and getting to know people. I was inspired by my long bouts of study to provide anybody with some tips that can apply to school exams, university assignments or tests and even workplace presentations! Hopefully you can find some useful tips in this. Here we go:

1. Create a study space

This is a bit of a way to give yourself a little procrastination time before you knuckle down and study. For me, I wrote out definitions on cue cards and stuck them all around my desk so everywhere I looked there were definitions staring at me. It really helps for when you have to learn some specific words (like vocabulary for your SATs) or mathematics formulas and even when your taking a break or just walking around your room your eyes can drift to them so you’ll basically be studying 24/7. This study space can also have charts, diagrams, visual aids etc. that will help you remember. It can also be filled with motivational pictures to get you to study (mine was photos of the place I’m going on a holiday to once I finished).

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2. Internet Detox

Stash your phone, iPod, iPad, tablet, TV, gaming console, nintendo DS etc. away. I hid mine in my hallway cupboard which was a real deterrent because it involved getting up from my chair (which I was too lazy to do). Turn all your devices on silent or off so you won’t get distracted by notifications. You’ll notice I left laptops out of my list of things to lock away because you need them to do research or type notes. This will take serious restraint as it will involve you needing to avoid the temptation of going onto other sites such as Tumblr, online shopping sites or games. If you have absolutely zero self control (don’t feel bad I could only use my laptop in the last week of studying) put it away and opt for the good ol’ pen and paper technique then head to your local library to do some research that’s offline.

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3. Teach Others Your Wisdom

I have younger siblings. By the end of these past few months they basically know the same content that I do. Because I taught them. Which in turn taught myself. If you find repeating information out loud to yourself really helps then trying teaching other people about it. Whether it’s your family, friends or your pets literally just sit there and ramble about what you’re learning. Then take it a step further and give them your notes so that they can ask you questions and make you actually teach them the information. I find this is great for subjects where you have to answer explain, discuss, analysis, evaluate etc. type questions because you can actually practice building an answer up.

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4. Have Breaks – but productive one’s

This was where I had a few of my mishaps. When you work really productively for 40 minutes to an hour DON’T, I repeat, DON’T ruin this handwork by turning on the tv or putting a movie on and getting very distracted. You will want to finish the episode, then finish the season, then finish the entire series because when it’s 12am  you’re going to be in bed crying about the lack of knowledge you have inside your brain. So when you have a break make sure to do something productive. Clean your room, clean the house, walk your pet, make yourself some food or go sit out in the sun. Something that will not involve you getting absorbed in it so much that you won’t be able to tear yourself away. If it has some form of physical activity in it that’d be great as well.

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5. Make a schedule. And stick to it

Make a study schedule. Write down what you’re going to study or work on and write a *realistic* time for you to do it. Include breaks and other activities that you do (like a part time job or cooking dinner). Stick to this thing religiously. I had almost 20 alarms on my phone that would go off during the day telling me to “take a break”, “read more case studies” and “take a shower you stink like arse”.

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6. Work Out What Works for You

Most importantly work out what studying techniques work for you. Do you have to see things on pieces of paper to understand them? Do it. Do you have to record yourself and listen to your notes on the bus? Make that mixtape. Do you have to build models of cells do understand how they work? Get building. Each person is different in the way they learn and work so find out what works for you and achieve whatever goal you want to achieve!

Hopefully these tips help! I know the list isn’t very long but I’ve just busted out the old laptop and am getting back into the swing of things! Hope you enjoyed it and give it a like and a follow! Comment your study tips down below and good luck for anything educational or work related you have on x

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Competitiveness

I’m super competitive. Very very competitive! It’s such a bad thing! During the sport classes at school I’d always have to be the best (this slowly died down by the time I reached my senior years for fear of what the others would say but that’s a whole other story). Even on silly little things like the interhouse athletics carnivals. I personally felt like a loser if my house didn’t win (but we did majority of the time so that’s okay).

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It’s not just me though, it runs in my family. My siblings are also super competitive and they bring out the worst in me. We would (still do actually) compete over the stupidest stuff like who has the biggest bruise, who’s been injured the most amount of times, who got sick the worst, who has played basketball longer etc. Purely the dumbest stuff.

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It’s actually so unhealthy! I find myself getting competitive over the most trivial things! Even with little kids or old people and then I get worried because I don’t want to be that loser aunt who always beats the kids at games and stuff and makes them cry.

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And do you want to know this sudden inspiration for this post? No it wasn’t the sick joy I felt when I sent a red turtle to crash my 5 year old cousins kart of Mario Kart. It was the fact that I was sitting in my car from 7:30 to 9 o’clock, in the dark, all alone in a grey on grey tracksuit to win concert tickets from a radio station.

On the plus side I won the tickets so I will be seeing 5 Seconds of Summer live! This made me very excited to be a winner, so I think the hand cramp was worth it.

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I’ll make sure to take heaps of photos for you guys and let you know how it went! Let me know if you’re competitive like myself and if you are, what do you do to curb it so you don’t look like that sad family member who has nothing better to do than beat little kids at video games?